Ants in My Pants…
They are everywhere! Everywhere I look there are ants. Open my book to do some homework and what should be there to great me, my friend Mr. Rogers. Mr. Rogers is extremely friend. He always has a nice ant smile when I see him, but Mr. Rogers’ growing family is starting to trouble me. Why? Well, I will let you in on a little secret…Mr. Rogers’ nephew is dating Mrs. Fireant’s daughter and is also dating Mr. Wiggles’ daughter too…at the same time. ::Gasp:: This has resulted in a soap ant-opera to say the least. Everyone is starting to uncover each others secrets and this has led to numerous ants abandoning their native home in search of grander places with less drama. The new hotspot appears to be on my desk. I suppose the amenities are good. Computer, music, usually a water bottle or two (a.k.a. a swimming pool), a little bouncy ball that results in hours of entertainment. However, I think the real enticement to my desk is the twirling demon, but I’ve had to start regulating the hours of operation for the twirling demon because it was being severely abused. Little Patsy was found living on the twirling demon, I caught her in the act of…nevermind. I won’t torture you with the images. So I appeal to the ants, please move to another location; maybe my roommates side of the room. I’m sure she won’t mind.
In other news the post office closes at four. For those of you who thought maybe it didn’t close until 4:30 you are wrong. The big CLOSED sign on the window informed me of this whole closing time thing. They really should be clearer about this, maybe use a big red sign instead of a green one. I equate green with go which would imply open, not closed. Thus, I think the sign should be changed to red. It makes sense.
I have this one spot in my room that hates posters. How do I know this? The wall has told me on numerous occasions. Now, before you all start to think I’m going crazy, the wall doesn’t actually talk but the signals it gives off are easy to interpret. Poster one was placed in the “spot” and poster one fell down on almost everyday. For the last 3 months of last semester, poster one was help up by the Christmas lights and not the wall. Enter poster 2. Poster one was ceremoniously taken down (tear, tear) and in its place poster 2. It has been 2 weeks since poster 2 was placed in the “spot” and how has poster 2 faired. Not good. Poster 2 has suffered the same fate as poster 1. It is now being held up by the Christmas lights. “I’m sorry Mr. Wall, do you not like my posters. I will gladly get you one that you enjoy if you promise to allow it to stay up longer than a day. Do we have an agreement?” I’m still waiting for a response…
I love grass. I know I have mentioned this before but I feel the need to reiterate my love affair with grass. I love green grass that is not too thick, but not too thin either. There is this perfect consistence that brings a joy that is beyond words. When you step on it you get two glorious sensations, a slight sinking feeling and yet you get the accompanying spring shortly after. It’s like walking on cushioned air. Ahhh, I love grass. Odd keebler, I will get to my point because I actually do have one. I want to grow a little grass garden in my room. I’ve mentioned this to Helen and of course she reminded me of Mrs. Mums. Mrs. Mums was a plant I had last semester. Mrs. Mums was a little neglected, so I forgot to water her for a few weeks, but in my defense Mrs. Mums wasn’t suppose to live through winter anyways. I just sped up her demise. But I fully assume all responsibility for her departure and have a new appreciation for plants. Thus, I feel that I am ready and able to take on a new plant of my own…hello Mr. Grass. I will water you everyday, and give you lots of sun, and most importantly give you all the love you could ever need. Mr. Grass will live a long and healthy life…I promise.
Breaking News:
-The wall has agreed to my compromise. We are negogiating the terms as we speak.
-Susie Fireant and Gigi Wiggles have just found out little Fred Rogers is seeing both of them….stay tuned for upcoming details.
I poured Spot remover on my dog. Now he's gone.
They are everywhere! Everywhere I look there are ants. Open my book to do some homework and what should be there to great me, my friend Mr. Rogers. Mr. Rogers is extremely friend. He always has a nice ant smile when I see him, but Mr. Rogers’ growing family is starting to trouble me. Why? Well, I will let you in on a little secret…Mr. Rogers’ nephew is dating Mrs. Fireant’s daughter and is also dating Mr. Wiggles’ daughter too…at the same time. ::Gasp:: This has resulted in a soap ant-opera to say the least. Everyone is starting to uncover each others secrets and this has led to numerous ants abandoning their native home in search of grander places with less drama. The new hotspot appears to be on my desk. I suppose the amenities are good. Computer, music, usually a water bottle or two (a.k.a. a swimming pool), a little bouncy ball that results in hours of entertainment. However, I think the real enticement to my desk is the twirling demon, but I’ve had to start regulating the hours of operation for the twirling demon because it was being severely abused. Little Patsy was found living on the twirling demon, I caught her in the act of…nevermind. I won’t torture you with the images. So I appeal to the ants, please move to another location; maybe my roommates side of the room. I’m sure she won’t mind.
In other news the post office closes at four. For those of you who thought maybe it didn’t close until 4:30 you are wrong. The big CLOSED sign on the window informed me of this whole closing time thing. They really should be clearer about this, maybe use a big red sign instead of a green one. I equate green with go which would imply open, not closed. Thus, I think the sign should be changed to red. It makes sense.
I have this one spot in my room that hates posters. How do I know this? The wall has told me on numerous occasions. Now, before you all start to think I’m going crazy, the wall doesn’t actually talk but the signals it gives off are easy to interpret. Poster one was placed in the “spot” and poster one fell down on almost everyday. For the last 3 months of last semester, poster one was help up by the Christmas lights and not the wall. Enter poster 2. Poster one was ceremoniously taken down (tear, tear) and in its place poster 2. It has been 2 weeks since poster 2 was placed in the “spot” and how has poster 2 faired. Not good. Poster 2 has suffered the same fate as poster 1. It is now being held up by the Christmas lights. “I’m sorry Mr. Wall, do you not like my posters. I will gladly get you one that you enjoy if you promise to allow it to stay up longer than a day. Do we have an agreement?” I’m still waiting for a response…
I love grass. I know I have mentioned this before but I feel the need to reiterate my love affair with grass. I love green grass that is not too thick, but not too thin either. There is this perfect consistence that brings a joy that is beyond words. When you step on it you get two glorious sensations, a slight sinking feeling and yet you get the accompanying spring shortly after. It’s like walking on cushioned air. Ahhh, I love grass. Odd keebler, I will get to my point because I actually do have one. I want to grow a little grass garden in my room. I’ve mentioned this to Helen and of course she reminded me of Mrs. Mums. Mrs. Mums was a plant I had last semester. Mrs. Mums was a little neglected, so I forgot to water her for a few weeks, but in my defense Mrs. Mums wasn’t suppose to live through winter anyways. I just sped up her demise. But I fully assume all responsibility for her departure and have a new appreciation for plants. Thus, I feel that I am ready and able to take on a new plant of my own…hello Mr. Grass. I will water you everyday, and give you lots of sun, and most importantly give you all the love you could ever need. Mr. Grass will live a long and healthy life…I promise.
Breaking News:
-The wall has agreed to my compromise. We are negogiating the terms as we speak.
-Susie Fireant and Gigi Wiggles have just found out little Fred Rogers is seeing both of them….stay tuned for upcoming details.
I poured Spot remover on my dog. Now he's gone.
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